In   Lebanon , men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.

(Like THAT makes sense.)

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In   Bahrain , a male doctor may legally examine a woman’s genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.

(Do they look different reversed?)

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Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

(A brick?)

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The penalty for masturbation in   Indonesia is decapitation.

(Much worse than ‘going blind!’)

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There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins,who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time

Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.

(Let’s just think for a minute; is there

any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)

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In   Hong Kong , a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.

The husband’s illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.

(Ah! Justice!)

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Topless saleswomen are legal in   Liverpool ,   England   – but only in tropical fish stores.

(But of course!)

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In   Cali , Colombia , a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.

(Makes one shudder at the thought.)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In   Santa Cruz , Bolivia , it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.

(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In   Maryland , it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises.’

(Is this a great country or what?

Well,…. not as great as Guam  !)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Who volunteers for these tests?)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

(From drinking little bottles of ???)

(Did our government pay for this research??)

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Butterflies taste with their feet..

(Ah, geez.)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Starfish don’t have brains.

(I know some people like that, too.)

*~*~ *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

And, the best for last?

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

Thank you all for reading this.

If you need to reach me in the future, I will be in   Guam !!!!!!

I base this title on the following facts.

This was reported by the Associated Press: Romanian witches from the east and west will head to the southern plains and the Danube River on Thursday to threaten the government with spells and spirits because of the tax law, which came into effect Jan. 1.

I have never told anyone about this before but I come from a Romanian clan that has had many witches.  My mother’s family did come from Romania.  If you check the map you will see that the Transylvanian Mountains are in the north side of that country.  Of course you all know that was the home of Dracula who was a fictional character.  However south eastern Europe was known to be the home of many strange peoples.  It is believed to be the home of most Gypsy clans.

The stories I tell you were related by my mother.  Added to my own experience they do cause me to believe there is an element of truth.

-My mother does look like a witch.  She has a long pointed nose and did have a cyst on her chin.  She cut that off with a kitchen knife when I was about 16 years old.  It grew back.

-The entire clan or family moved to Winnipeg, Canada in about the year 1900.  As a boy I returned to my grandparents home every summer.  My mother was one of 4 children but there was a 5^th child, a girl, who died at about 10 years old.  So one evening I went from my bedroom into the dining room.  The lights were out but there were candles on the table.  Everyone was holding hands and chanting together in a language unknown to me.  When I asked what was going on my mother got up from the table and rushed me back to bed. 

-My mother went by the name Sadie but her birth name was Sarah.  My mother explained that an aunt of hers had given that name to one of her children.  The aunt told my grandmother that she must change her daughter’s name from Sarah or she would put a curse on her. 

-My great grandmother became infuriated with my mother’s older sister.  She did put a curse on her.  She said that Elsie would marry after her younger sister and never have any children.  That is precisely what happened.  Elsie was engaged and suddenly the groom broke the engagement.  My grandparents sent Elsie to Paris to find another love.  That did not happen.  In the late years of her life she telephoned relatives and friends screaming incoherent things.  The phone company did disconnect her service. 

-I have no powers at all.  My children ignore me and the curses I put on my bosses all failed.   I believe my sister is wicked but fear telling her that.

-I do not fear black cats, Friday the 13^th, or walking under a ladder. In all other matters I am a failed witch.